Once upon a time there was a young woman who set out on a journey. Her family and friends had advised her to do so. After all, the only way to achieve anything in life is to venture out into the world and work hard. So she left the familiar world of her village to find her happiness in the distance. Soon she found a town that looked very promising. She decided to take a closer look around and stay there. The joy of getting to know the people there and discovering new things was great. A little later, she even met a man she thought could accompany her through life. She had also found work quickly. So she lived out day after day. But she soon noticed that her life felt superficial and monotonous. After a while, her body started sending signals to her, showing her that something was not right at all. She listened to herself and realised that self-doubt, the fear of failure and the conviction that she was not good enough had become her primary motive for action. She did not like that at all. She wanted to change the situation and summoned up all her remaining strength and decided to leave the man and seek help outside the city. During her journey she met a healer to whom she described her situation. The healer said “Come, I will give you a roof over your head, some food and help you to deal with your fears. All you have to do is give me a hand and help me with my tasks”. So the young woman decided to dare. She started to work for the healer. She noticed that the tasks she was given were easy and even fun. Soon a feeling of contentment set in, as she felt that the tasks made her feel like doing something meaningful for humanity. At least she helped to make the people who came to the healer feel better again. In addition the healer asked her every evening “What did you learn about yourself during the tasks today?” In the beginning the question had seemed strange to her and she wondered how all this would help with her negative emotions. It was not easy for her to answer. But the more she thought about the question, the more she got used to it and enjoyed telling the healer what she had learned about herself. She talked about how she had solved the problems and which skills she had used to do so. Little by little the young woman realised that her self-doubt and fear of failure had almost completely disappeared. She asked the wise woman “Tell me, how is it possible that all my fears have disappeared?” The wise woman smiled and said “Child, it is because you have found your Fabulousity.”
And she lived happily ever after.
Well, if it were always that easy. Even though the story might sound like a fairy tale and seem a bit abstract, some of you might find yourself in the story of the young woman. I, for my part, can. Unfortunately, we don’t all have such a healer in our lives, who talks to us about ourselves every evening. But shall I tell you something? Having a healer like that is helpful, yes. But the good news is that there are things you can do yourself to get to your Famosity. With a little help you can become your own healer. There are several factors that form the foundation of your famosity and can be a guide for you to reach your famosity.
Covering basic and security needs
Dealing with yourself and your environment costs time and energy. This is something that you can’t put between your door and your fishing rod or on the way to the shops. But if we know that we have enough food and drink, that we regularly receive money and that everything important that we need to survive is secured, then we are open for dealing with ourselves. On the road to famosity it is therefore helpful to first try to create a safe and healthy environment where you can deal with yourself without fear and worry. If you find yourself in a situation where you cannot do this on your own, do not hesitate to get help. This is not a sign of weakness, but the first step you take towards becoming fabulous.
Living your values
Every person is different. We all have different ideas and wishes about life. Yet we are all the same in one. On the way to adulthood we develop different principles that are important for our lives. These are values which, in pure form and without the influence of society, are the main motivation for all our decisions and all our actions in life. Since we do not live alone in the world, it can happen that our personal values are overshadowed by values that are, for example, dictated to us by society. We then focus on things that are supposedly important to us, because society appreciates us for them. Sooner or later this leads to dissatisfaction, disorientation or exhaustion. Values serve as an anchor for a good life. Knowing one’s own values is therefore a step towards getting closer to Fabulousity.
Using your talents
Every person has talents. It is not always easy to discover and develop them. But it is essential for one’s own famosity. So take your time and find out what your talents are and use them as often as you can. Reflect on them and turn talents into strengths. Then you know exactly what you can do and learn to trust yourself. Furthermore, if you use your talents or strengths more often, you will notice that you go through life more contentedly and that things are easier for you.
Recognising emotions and adapting your actions
We have all experienced it. Suddenly we feel an emotion that makes us act in a completely exaggerated way. Suddenly we feel an emotion that we don’t like at all and try to put on the Poker Face so that nobody (including ourselves) notices what is happening inside us. In our society it seems to be a taboo subject to talk about negative emotions. We don’t want our counterpart to feel uncomfortable or to be perceived as weak. The more often we lock our emotions away, the higher the pressure in the metaphorical pressure cooker becomes, which eventually leads to overpressure and an explosion. Emotions always arise for a reason, mostly when people act in the sense of our values or against our values. A careful handling of our emotions can therefore serve as a compass to orientate one’s actions according to one’s own values and to achieve Fabulousity.
Dealing with crises
No matter how well we know ourselves and no matter how well our basic needs are met, there will always be crises in life. That is simply part of it. Just as there is no light without shadow or low tide without high tide. So for Famosity it is important to know how to deal with these crises. It is not about finding ways to simply leave the crisis behind. Sure, we humans are great at locking away unpleasant things or simply suppressing them. But this behaviour is not what I mean. Crises are about dealing with them, learning from them and coming out stronger. That always sounds very easy when you are not in a crisis and it is harder when you are experiencing a crisis. But that can also be learned.
The journey to Fabulousity is individual. So every fabulous woman has her own ways to strengthen her Fabulousity.
What do you do to strengthen your Fabulousity? Which factors must be right for you to swim in your Fabulousity?
We are curious to hear what you tell us and are happy to read about you.